How bonding over shared interests can open a door to share the hope of Jesus

Hey everyone! My name is Sophi. A few years ago I was in East Asia, taking classes at a university, and while there, I became friends with a girl.

We first bonded at the coffee shop on campus. She had Taylor Swift stickers on her laptop, so I knew that we were going to be great friends. We talked for hours about our interests, school day, family, friends, careers, dreams. She gave me a tour of campus the next day and we kept hanging out in the days after that.

One night we got to talk about some of the heavy burdens that she was carrying. Her parents were sick and she was their caretaker on top of being a full-time student. She worked on the weekends to pay for their medicine. She felt all alone sometimes.

I told her she was dealing with so much, but that she was not alone. That there was someone who wanted to hear her worries and who was a safe place for her. A refuge. Someone who made darkness hide and brought light. A true friend.

She said she wanted to know more about this person. And as I was sharing the story of Who Jesus is and what He has done for us, she asked questions.

She also told me about these spirits that her people believe in: a dark spirit and a light spirit. She said she was doing laundry not long ago and she felt so heavy. She started to cry and she begged for someone to help her, and when she did, she said she felt a huge weight lift off of her and she heard chains being dragged away from her. She told me that she always thought it was the light spirit, but now she believed it was Jesus who helped her.

I told her my own stories about Jesus helping me and that there was a whole book full of stories about him.

These conversations taught me how to build trust with someone, build a relationship with someone, and in turn being able to have these deep conversations. It taught me how I wanted to have spiritual conversations with people, something I now put to use in my everyday life.

Thanks for listening! Have a good day.

Do you persist or adapt when you hit a roadblock in sharing the good news?

Hey there, friend.

We know the journey of sharing the gospel is not always a smooth path. Sometimes you come across challenges that make you wonder: Should I keep pushing ahead or try a different approach? That’s where the dance between persistence and adaptation comes in.

Together, we can trust the Holy Spirit to guide us when facing challenges to sharing the gospel. And ultimately, employing these two approaches — persistence and adaptation — you can grow deeper and more meaningful relationships with those you love: mom, dad, son, daughter, friend, neighbor.

Let’s dive into this exciting journey together, drawing insights from the “Noticing” chapter in Doug Pollock’s short book, “God Space.”

Perseverance: embracing patience

Picture this: You’re sharing your faith and, suddenly, you hit a roadblock. The other person is willing to answer your spiritual questions but only with short answers. Or maybe on the soccer sideline another parent seems interested, but phone calls or developments in the game keep distracting them.

It’s in these moments that perseverance becomes your ally. It’s about not giving up. But hey, we understand — it’s not always easy:

Dealing with roadblocks: Discovering ways to continue the conversation in the context of your relationship is the focus of perseverance. When facing a roadblock like short answers, you could ask a powerful question, “What is an aspect of faith that is interesting to you?”
Asking God to help: God wants all people to be saved (1 Timothy 2:3-4, NIV). So in the soccer example, you can first ask him to remove distractions long enough for you to talk about him with the other person. Then patiently persevere in bringing up spiritual topics and see what happens.

What’s awesome about perseverance? It shows your dedication and authenticity. Your commitment shines through, building a foundation of trust and setting the stage for incredible conversations about God.

Adaptation: embracing change

Switch gears for a moment and think about a different roadblock. The person you’re talking with gets upset discussing “religion” and shuts down. In this case, adaptation rather than perseverance is likely the best way forward. Adaptation is all about being flexible and willing to adjust your approach. But hey, adapting comes with its own set of challenges:

Stepping outside of your comfort zone: Trying something new can be a bit nerve-wracking. But remember, growth often comes from stepping out of your comfort zone.
Adapting isn’t failing: You might worry that changing things up means you’re giving up. But adapting shows that you genuinely care about their spiritual journey and not your methods.

Adaptation lets you meet people where they are spiritually and creates opportunity for deeper, more meaningful conversations. Adapting in the example above could be taking the time to show empathy by asking questions with gentleness about their experience with religion. By matching your approach to their needs, you’re showing them that you’re listening and that you value their perspective.

Striking the balance: when to persist and when to adapt

Now, let’s chat about the art of balancing. How do you know when to hold on and when to pivot? Keep these pointers in mind:

Hopeful persistence: If you sense openness beyond the roadblocks, be it internal or external, then persistence can be your guiding light. In this case, your patience and the respect you show the other person can go a long way.
Your current approach may not be effective: If your current approach is not increasing your relationship and might even be straining your connection, it’s time to consider adapting. Remember, adapting is not waving a white flag of surrender — it’s about finding better ways to connect. Check out a lesson* in the GodTools app to discover new ideas for connecting.
Persistence and adaptation can work together: Persevering in the relationship often calls for adapting your approach in the conversation.

*Lessons are only available in the app.

A growing relationship

As you navigate gospel conversations, remember that both perseverance and adaptation have their place. Effectiveness lies in the authenticity of your intentions, the love you show, and your sincere desire to share the life-changing message of the gospel. While you persevere in guiding the other person to explore the person of Jesus, be open to adapting your approach. This openness reflects your genuine care and commitment to their well-being.

In the end, the heart of evangelism lies in building relationships — between you and that person, and between that person and God. You are the guide on the other person’s spiritual journey, the two of you taking steps together toward Jesus. As you look through the practical tips in GodTools Pelajaran, you’ll find yourself better equipped to strike the balance between perseverance and adaptation. Then you can more effectively invite others to experience the profound beauty of faith in Christ.

How to react when the person you’ve shared the gospel with says no to Jesus

Transcript:

Hi, I’m Bobby and here’s a conversation I had. I was at the weekly meeting of a Christian group I was a part of at my college.

I was there early and, as the band practiced the worship set, an international student from East Asia walked in.

So to make him feel welcome, I introduced myself. He had heard music coming from the room as he was walking by and he wanted to see what was going on.

As we talked, I was able to tell him what our group was about and that we connect people to God through Jesus. He was interested to know more, but the meeting was starting.

However, he agreed to get coffee with me the next day and continue the conversation.

So the next day we met up at Starbucks and I was able to talk about the gospel with him using the Knowing God Personally tool in the GodTools app.

And what was special about this conversation was that I used the parallel language feature for the first time. I shared each point in English, and then also in his native language.

And as we went through each point, I could tell that reading it in his own language was helping him to understand the gospel more deeply. He told me he had never heard this message before and he was amazed that God wants to forgive people for free, without earning it.

But when we got to the last point I asked him if he would want to begin a relationship with Jesus by faith. He looked at me, with longing but also resistance, and he told me he couldn’t receive a gift like this, that he wasn’t able to accept it for free, he would have to earn it.

Now sadly, I wasn’t able to help him get past that and later we lost contact. But not long after that I saw him again. I was glad to see that God was continuing to work in his life. And I believe I am just one of the many ways Christ is pursuing a relationship with him.

5 things to keep in mind when talking about God does not go as planned

On a cold, gray afternoon two friends waited together for the bus that would take them home. Daniel had been a faithful Christian since his youth. Alex had lost his faith after his mother’s early death. The young men had built a solid friendship based on honesty, but they had never talked together about the gospel.

While they waited, Alex bought two cups of coffee to warm them up. As they enjoyed their drinks they talked with anticipation about the comforts of home. Their conversation created a warm atmosphere and Daniel felt that it was opening the door to a deep spiritual conversation. He decided to respectfully ask for permission to share what gave meaning to his life, and Alex agreed.

Taking out his phone and opening the GodTools app, Daniel chose the evangelistic tool called THE FOUR. The conversation went well, but when Daniel invited Alex to make a decision to follow Christ, everything changed. Alex said he didn’t believe what Daniel believed about God. He claimed that if God existed, he would be a sadistic being who takes pleasure in human suffering without stepping in to help. He thanked Daniel for his words but rejected the idea of believing in that kind of God.

Daniel was frozen. His fears about sharing the gospel had come true. He didn’t know how to react or what to say. Though he managed to clarify some points before the bus came, he was overwhelmed on the ride home by a mixture of disappointment, guilt and sadness. Thoughts crowded his mind, and doubt invaded him.

Daniel’s story may be similar to something you’ve experienced. Negative responses to evangelism can be discouraging and can undermine your confidence. However, these negative experiences can also become turning points in your spiritual journey, and they can help you find the right focus on God.

So here are five things to remember when your spiritual conversations do not go as planned:

Let love for God and for your neighbor be your guide.
The main goal of having a conversation about the gospel is not to persuade people to join a specific religion or church. Rather, it’s about loving God by sharing about his love for humanity — love that he expressed through the death and resurrection of his Son. So remember that this conversation is not a debate but an expression of love.
Be empathetic.
Negative responses to the gospel are often motivated by traumatic life experiences or negative interactions with other Christians. Take the time to listen to what the other person has to say and try to understand their point of view.
Do not try to win the argument.
You can be tempted to see negative responses as an invitation to argue until the other person is forced to accept your point of view. However, this does not often yield good results. Instead of feeling loved, the other person may feel attacked. Remember that the message of the gospel is a message of love, not a product they need to buy.
Do not take it personally.
You may think that people take a negative attitude toward the gospel because they hate you or just do not like you. But most of the time, when someone does not accept the message of the gospel, it’s simply because they have chosen not to. It’s not about you but a personal choice they have made.
Put your thoughts into perspective.
A negative response to what you share about God can shake your confidence. That’s why it’s important to evaluate your inner dialogue. Ask yourself, “How do I feel at the end of this conversation? What thoughts are filling my mind?” Once you answer those questions, you’ll begin seeing ways to improve future conversations. You’ll also spot negative thoughts about your identity that you must surrender to God and throw away.

It’s not easy when a conversation does not go as planned. That’s why it’s crucial to maintain the right focus, remembering why Jesus wants you to have these conversations in the first place.

You can personally share your faith because of what God put inside you

Evangelism can be hard. Sometimes it can be really hard. Maybe you’ve even said to yourself, “It’s just not for me. I’m afraid of arguments. I’m too awkward. I’m not good at this.”

In reality, God has equipped all Christians to do evangelism in unique and different ways. It is average Christians, not just talented celebrity evangelists, who are able to speak and demonstrate the gospel to their friends and neighbors. When we shift our perspective, we see that our unique personalities and circumstances are actually a front doormat to sharing our faith. Even seeming weaknesses can actually be our strengths.

Let’s look together at how God has uniquely equipped and positioned you to share your faith.

1. An effective tool in your evangelism toolkit is actually your own personality

Here are a few examples of how aspects of your personality can work to your advantage in having conversations about Jesus.

Introversion: You can empathize with others who would be put off by someone asking them lots of questions or forcing them into a conversation. The best person to reach someone who is shy or less talkative is often someone with those same traits.
Extroversion: Use your outgoing nature to help others feel noticed. A simple compliment, encouragement or observation can open doors to conversation that otherwise would be closed. Doug Pollock in “God Space” says that when you notice others it sends them a powerful message: “I notice you. You matter to me! You matter to God!”
Personality traits: You can use your abilities and areas of expertise to help others feel free to be themselves and talk openly about spiritual topics. Maybe you’re good at planning, giving advice or remembering birthdays. Or maybe you love to make extra cookies you can pass out to friends or neighbors. Each aspect of who you are is an opportunity to serve the other person and build trust with them. This will also help the other person see the gospel demonstrated in your life before they hear it from your lips.

2. God has put you where you are not by accident but intentionally

Have you ever considered where God has put you? Your physical location, emotional state, geography, or occupation influence your opportunities to share the gospel.

Take a look at some of these examples:

Struggles: Maybe you’ve struggled with depression, anxiety, or chronic pain — and maybe you still do. Because of your first-hand experience, you’ve been given the chance to talk authentically to others in those same situations about the hope Jesus offers.
Interests: Your love of a particular hobby or sport can connect you to others who need to hear the gospel. Whether it’s gardening, playing soccer or making the perfect omelet, your interests help pave the way for building relationships and demonstrating the gospel with your life.
Occupation: Your job may be bringing you into contact with people you can speak hope, peace and life to on a daily basis. These people may never hear or see the gospel expressed except through your life and interactions with them.
Finances: You can demonstrate the gospel through the way you use your money. In their book “Right Here, Right Now,” Alan Hirsch and Lance Ford say that “missional hospitality is a tremendous opportunity to extend the kingdom of God. We can literally eat our way into the kingdom of God! If every Christian household regularly invited a stranger or a poor person into their home for a meal once a week, we would literally change the world by eating!”

Changing your point of view can make a huge difference

Believe that you were made for each moment and every conversation and that God has supplied you uniquely to do so. When you can believe that, then evangelism isn’t something you rehearse and share, it’s just something you live out naturally by trusting God’s plan. The solution isn’t to be more attentive, funnier or more interesting to talk to. It’s to embrace your gifts, interests and unique traits, which help you create opportunities to speak and demonstrate the gospel.

Yes, it does sound a little cliche, but the answer to how you can personally do evangelism really is inside of you — because God put it there. We are all God’s masterpiece, “fearfully and wonderfully made” (Psalm 139:14). That means He put intention behind creating you to be who you are so you can reach other people.

An unexpected situation can be the right time to share the gospel

Hi, my name is Sienna*. For two years my husband and I shared the message of Jesus with university students in a part of Africa where Christians are few and often persecuted. One day, I invited a young woman named Nicole* to have coffee with me. When she arrived she had a friend with her — a guy!

I didn’t know what to do at first, because in this African culture girls do not often talk with guys. I prayed silently and asked God to lead the conversation and show me the reason why her friend Finn* was at the meeting. Soon after, we started talking about spiritual things, and I knew God was asking me to share the gospel with Nicole and Finn.

I asked if it was OK to show them an app on my phone that explains what Christians believe. They agreed and I started showing them the Four Spiritual Laws on the GodTools app. Nicole politely read and listened, but she was clearly not interested. Finn, however, took my phone and read through the Four Laws over and over, mesmerized.

He said, “A few years ago, I started feeling like there has to be more to God than what we are taught in this country. So I’ve been searching for who he truly is. In fact, just recently I’ve become curious about what the Bible says about God. I can’t believe I met you!”

At the end of the conversation, Finn and I prayed together that God would reveal himself to Finn. A couple of weeks later, I received a text from Finn that said, “I need to meet with you and your husband, and we need to talk about Jesus. I had a dream about him last night!” Jason* and I were so excited, we practically sprinted to the nearest cafe to meet with him.

As Finn described his dream, he said, “I saw a man dressed in white approaching me. I knew it had to be Jesus! He walked closer and closer until he was standing right in front of me. He didn’t even say anything to me. He simply looked me in the eyes. I don’t know how to explain it, but when he looked at me, I immediately understood in my heart that this was God! I knew right then that the Jesus of the Bible is real and he answered my prayer!”

Soon afterward, we met with Finn again. At this next meeting, Finn prayed the prayer at the end of the Four Spiritual Laws and accepted Jesus as his Savior. And he was so excited about his newfound faith that he wanted to share it with others that same day! Hours after becoming a Christian himself, Finn joined Jason in finding other students to share the Four Spiritual Laws with!

And it hasn’t ended there. For two years, Finn has regularly shared his faith with his friends and family. He has become a key part of our city’s growing Christian community.

*All the names in this story have been changed for security reasons.